They think it's all over......it is now!

That's it.
All done.
20 sessions of radiotherapy, including 5 intensive electron therapies.
Finished.
Completed.
Endured.
I know I should be skipping round the room with a bottle of bolly, celebrating. But somehow I can't. Because with the completion of my last treatment, came the appointment card for my next trip to hospital.....in just three weeks time. 
See, I want to say 'Hurrah! It's all over'. 
But in reality it's not. 
It'll never be 'over'. 
This morning, Lily said, "Ooooh Mummy. No radiotherapy today. You can spend all day in your pyjamas." and yes - it was one of the loveliest things that have been said recently. And yes - it is a joy, not to travel the daily 101 miles for treatment - I am relieved and happy that part is over. And I want to thank everybody especially LeeM, Dad & Gary for providing such an excellent taxi service.
And while you're asking...I won't be told I'm in 'remission' nor will I be given the 'all-clear'. Apparently it doesn't work like that.
I shall be 'living with cancer'.
Well, let's look on the bright side...it's better than 'dying with cancer'. :-)
So. What next?
Well - the site of the radiotherapy is likely to react in around 7 - 10days. Blistering sunburn. Watch out for skin breakage & infection. Mmmmm. Nice! Internally in that area - it is a little painful. And hot. But nothing worth shouting too loudly about. I am to rest and rest some more. 'Put your feet up' - they said. Oh Lordy....not again! Ignoring all advice today - I went to get my nails done - nothing new there! And raided Holland & Barrett for some healthy gloop. Oh, didn't I mention? I've been juicing for the last few days. The chemo has really affected my digestive system and I find it really hard to eat salads, plates of vegetables, lots of fruit. In fact I struggle with anything bigger than a baby-sized portion. Chicken & meat are off the menu. Though I still have a thing for sausages..I know - not the healthiest thing on the list. So - after researching & chatting to my friend JoeyP (who has the said juicer) - I've splashed out & bought one. It's fantastic. And boy, don't I feel smug! You throw in whole unpeeled apples, chunks of pineapple, spinach, carrots, lemons, limes, oranges, broccoli, kale, cucumber, avocado. Sounds revolting..(actually it usually looks revolting - like something Shrek might drink) - but incredibly tasty. And it's jammed packed full of good stuff. So, to make it even healthier, I went to H&B for spirulina and wheat grass powder. Now I'm not suggesting this Shrek juice will keep the cancer at bay alone - but at least alongside the conventional chemical medicine, I am getting lots of vitamins, minerals & antioxidants. It cant be a bad thing. Can it? Perhaps I'll throw an aspirin in for good measure (see the press today).
And I've cooked a 10 bean & red lentil chilli for tonight. Heeheehee. Gary, the carnivore, will be SO impressed (not!). Check out the methane gas levels tonight. Nice & cheap tho. And tasty!
We've not had any takers for the house yet. But that's OK. The key time to sell is Easter - so we're ready. We lost the bungalow we put an offer on. As we hadn't sold ours - we couldn't begin the completion process. Oh well. Never mind. We'll see what comes up when ours sells. And it will. 
So the next couple of days?
I'm taking Lily's advice.
A pyjama day is definitely called for.
Bliss.
With champagne?
Maybe.
Definitely maybe.....

Lucky 13

Yes.
It's true.
13 radiotherapy sessions completed.....only 7 to go.
And I do feel lucky.
I feel lucky because I keep meeting up with people who have terrible tales to tell of their own cancer experiences. I'm the only patient - thus far - that I have met while in Exeter for this round of treatment, who had their diagnosis & main treatment at the local North Devon District Hospital.  And as we swap stories, while waiting to be zapped, there is a general disbelief at the speed of my diagnosis and subsequent treatment. Much of the horror stories lie with the GP's misdiagnosis/'go away it's nothing' attitude, and then varying quality of treatment at their local hospitals.
I truly cannot fault my own treatment.
And I thank God everyday that my GP recognised that something was wrong when I went to see her.
She saved my life.
And I have told her so.
I am lucky.


I am also sprouting!
Oh yes indeedy.
There is a noticeable fuzz going on where my hair used to be. At first I was sprouting white - yes - white tufts. For a natural blonde - this was quite a shock. "Will you paint it yellow?" Lily asked. Too right I will - I thought. Now, interspersed with white is a darker colour. Black - Lily says. Ouch! I'm personally going for dark blonde! It looks utterly ridiculous! But I can get a lather going on it when washing with Johnson's Baby Shampoo. Oh the joys.....


No takers on the house yet. We're still getting viewings though. It seems that everybody likes the bungalow very much, but the garden apparently not quite big enough. Well there's nothing we can do about that. It'll be the right size, one day, for somebody. The agents are getting anxious already & fear we may lose the other bungalow we have offered on. But- you know what. If we do - we do. I can't be bothered to lose sleep over it. It's just a house. There will be others. 
See, that's what having cancer does to you. 
It makes you realise what's important & what's not. 
And who is important to you & who is not. 
Cancer makes you sort the wheat from the chaff.....
And it's a great feeling.
So I still feel lucky.....
With my bag of wheat.

My day...

I went to my salon yesterday after treatment, for my manicure.
A total stranger, with an armful of fresh flowers came up to me - gave me the flowers & said "you look like you need these more than me - I know, you know."
I was completely taken aback. 
Either I looked particularly shite yesterday (!) or she sussed me out and showed me great kindness.
Thank you to that lady.
You made my day xx

Zapped

I'm counting again.

No, not in my profession - but counting the days, ticking them off one by one, as the radiotherapy sessions go by.

Had my first last Monday 20th. A good friend/neighbour of ours, decided that taking me to my sessions each Monday morning, was far more preferable than going to work! Another male car enthusiast - I learnt about drifting, sliding, and how to make your tyres smoke and burn on an empty airfield. An hour and 10mins to the hospital. 

Announcing my arrival, I sat & waited in the brand new Oncology unit at the Royal Devon & Exeter, in their Radiotherapy suite. A bright new modern addition to the hospital. I look around. I am the youngest in the room - yet again. The average age I put at 72. A lot of men in their late 60's and 70's. A few old dears in their 70's & 80's. A couple of ladies late 50's. And me.

I play, 'Guess who's wearing a wig?'. I can only see one contender. And even then - I'm not sure... a grey short number...or perhaps she's got really nice hair. I play 'Which part of the body are you having zapped today?'. One chap is obvious. A huge scar around his throat. Throat cancer or suchlike. Some of the candidates don't change into a popping semi gown. I guess their zapping is more accessible. 

After a short wait - I'm called through.

A quick change into the said gown...heck....I'm freezing. Mental note...bring a woolly to wrap around.

Another short wait - and then into the special room. A room of lasers, monstrous equipment, and a very hard bed - set up for me, resembling a torture chamber. The equipment reminds me of a giant hippopotamus - with his jaws wide open. I'm strapped to the the extremely uncomfortable bed - with my left arm tied behind my head. Lights off. Green lasers are beamed onto me - following the positions of my tattoos on my wonky boob. Some adjustments are made. The staff leave the room & I am to keep very still. Some beeping & noises for a couple of minutes & part one is complete. The staff re-enter the suite & set about phase two. The hippo now turns on its side & attacks me from a different angle. A longer session this time - but soon over.
So - this is repeated every day for 4 weeks. A breeze.
So I thought.
For the first two days - I was very sick after treatment. Couldn't keep anything down.
More anti-emetics given by the hospital & we got it under control.
Disappointed? You bet.
But I got through the week.
This week has been better. No more sickness - but the tiredness is certainly starting to bite - (as is the sunburn!). It could be the travel. The boring endless travel. Or - of course - I'm not actually getting much time to rest. I leave at 9.30am & return at 1pm-ish. Have lunch & then it's Lily time. I miss my leisurely mornings! 
Still. 8 sessions down.
12 to go.
A house to sell.
5 viewings.
No offers.
Yet.
The weather is lovely.
The snowdrops & crocuses are out.
The daffodils are on their way.
We'll be in full bloom.
Soon.
Easter is the peak time to sell your house.....
And we're ready!
Beautiful bungalow for sale........
Any takers?